It is easy to feel like life is out of your control, many aspects certainly are. There are, however, at least 10 things that you have control over all the time. So next time you feel like throwing in the towel because nothing is going your way, check in with these 10 ways to remind yourself that you do have control in a few very important areas of your life.
It is your choice to forgive others, no matter how much they have hurt you. Holding a grudge and bitterness in your heart doesn't hurt them as much as it hurts you. When you let it go, you are opening up space in your heart and mind to care for and love others (including yourself). Communicate with your friends if they have hurt you in some way, sometimes they do not even know what they have done wrong. What you do not know you can't fix. Give them the opportunity to change, and you might see the situation from another perspective.
Ask for help when you need it. Don't be afraid. It is up to you how difficult you make a situation. Often we choose not to ask for help maybe you don't want to be a burden or seem weak. Whatever the reason, it is your choice to ask for help. It is also your choice to help others in need.
It is up to you to decide the outlook you take on life. positive or negative, it is up to you. No matter the circumstances, your outlook is your own. You can make your reality more painful through a negative outlook, or help make the difficult times less tough by looking for that silver lining.
Half-assing most of what you do? Frustrated that you are not getting anywhere in life? How much effort are you choosing to put forth? You think there are not enough hours in the day, there are, you simply have to be dedicated and put in the effort. Will it be easy, no. However, if you want to achieve your dreams and goals, the effort that you put in will be in alignment with the results you get.
Going to the gym and eating well is a choice. It is easy to focus on other things that have immediate results. Loving and caring for your body is a constant process. If you choose to care for it, go to the gym, eat well, and have self-care it will begin to show.
Set and respect boundaries. Boundaries are critical for your wellbeing. If you do not set them, then you are giving others the option to treat you however they want. By setting boundaries you are showing others it is okay to treat me this way, but not that way.
Take it. Take responsibility for your actions and their reactions. Do not throw the blame onto someone else if something you do backfires. Own up to it, learn from it, and move forward. Also, take responsibility when things go RIGHT. So often we hear to take responsibility when things go wrong, but so many of us forget to relish in the moments when your hard work pays off. Do not short-change yourself. Embrace those sweet moments.
What are you spending your time and energy on? Binge-watching Netflix? Or are you taking action towards your goals and dreams? It is up to you to focus on what matters. Family, friends, dreams, goals, etc. Focus on a few goals at one time and tackle those, then move forward and focus on something else. If your focus is too wide, you will be overwhelmed and often not get anything done. Focus too small and you may limit what you are capable of. Find that happy balance and go rock it.
Have it. Love yourself. Life is too short to spend it hating various aspects of your being. Let go of the walls you have built up and practice self-acceptance. Wear the clothes you don't think you can pull off, look at yourself in the mirror and find 10 things that are beautiful, read positive books like "You are a Badass" or "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck".
Take it. Life is crazy. Find time to take small breaks. If that just means journaling for five minutes in the morning while you sip coffee, do it. Or maybe once a month scheduling a float session or a massage. Get together with a close friend and go on a hike or sip wine and watch a movie. Whatever helps you refocus and breathe, make it happen. You are in control.